set free

I grind stone to a fine powdery dust
As a rehearsal
Hoping some day I could do the same
For my soul
Which lies heavy, chunky, gradually solidifying
Within me

He talks to me in broken sentences
Tells me
From the time I was a child
I wished to flow
From the time I saw
I wished not to be everlasting but just happy
From the time I understood
I knew you for what you are
A thin, opaque, perforated sheet of plastic
Light not passing through
Along with me, held captive by you
From the time I could talk
I wished for meaningful conversations
But all you could do was mumble
Like looking within you was beyond you

We rarely talk now, me and my soul
Me because of the guilt and my soul because its pointless
But we sit sometimes, side by side on the bank of a river
Staring at rippled images of our selves
Drowning, melting, fading like liquid dreams
And then sometimes he looks sideways and looks at me
And I look right back

I try and tell him that I am trying
I am trying to grind the stone to a fine powdery dust
As a rehearsal
For a day when I would be able to grind myself
For my soul
For a day when I would be able to reduce myself to dust
A pile of dust
And be blown away and mix with the waters of this river
Mixed with liquid dreams
And set my soul free
And pray for it to be happy

Say something anything/
I have said all that I had to/
I have lost my voice/
It feels like trying to talk/
While I'm caught in a vortex/
Words seem to rise up/
Filling me with a hope/
That they will reach you/
But then they get captured/
Entangled in spirals/
And fall down/
Along with me/
Towards the eye of the hurricane/
Empty shells of former words remain/
Say something anything/
Like you used to/
Complete my sentences/
Like you used to/
Answer the questions/
I never needed to ask you/
Say something anything/
Or have you lost your voice too/
If not say something anything/
If yes, then smile, just a smile would do/

two halves make one fool

repair shop

For you/
I promise to remain/
In all things inanimate/
And all things alive/
For you/
I don't mind/
Living in yesterday/

Upside down

I'm lying down/
On the ground/
Look what I've found/
As I look/
Up above/
I wonder how/
All these buildings/
These bean-stalk buildings/
Have turned into these things/
That make the vast blue canvas/
Up high/
Look a little less/
Like the endless sky/
And a little more/
Like pieces of a puzzle/
Looking down pleadingly/
At me/
For an answer/
To all their troubles/
And then I think/
Of a time/
When I used to look up/
At the sky/
And imagine/
If only I could fly/
I would be up there/
I could get away/
That's where I would stay/
Make myself a home on the clouds/
A home with puffy doors/
And breezy windows/
I would open them/
And stare at the sea/
Turned up-side down/
With no shores/
There my sore musings/
Would be made light/
They would take flight/
But now instead/
As I lie down/
On this asphalt bed/
I find myself/
Staring at the sky/
And it staring back/
In an eternal moment/
Stretched further/
Into a pregnant quiet/
Each waiting to hear/
Something/
Anything/
From the other/

the labyrinthian inverted